Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
