Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
