Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
