yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
we're so committed to being not committed
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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