this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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