Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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