But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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