Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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