i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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