ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We got so high we made milksteak
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
