kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
