it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
