Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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