ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
