Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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