I hate all girls vehemently.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize