You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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