Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
