It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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