you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
