? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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