You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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