Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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