Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
one might say we're banned from that church
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
