Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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