Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
