Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
