you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
