I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
accomplished twins. life is a go
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
