now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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