Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
