I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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