Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
