She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
