I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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