Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
