Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I met the friendliest cop last night
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
