I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
