my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
