are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
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