So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
