My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
