Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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