you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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