Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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