laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
