We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
