There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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