yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
