Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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